i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I can't turn off my feet"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
