brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
We are all done wearing pants today
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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