what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
