While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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