guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
