He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
third nipple confirmed
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
