Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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