Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
