you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
