2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
