she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
