i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
