She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
