so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize