is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
