Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(850): View more from Florida

I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."

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(905): View more from Toronto

Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat

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(312): View more from Illinois

I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista

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(514): View more from Quebec

You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club

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(931): View more from Tennessee

i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.

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(770): View more from Georgia

possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer

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(705): View more from Ontario

I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday

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(502): View more from Kentucky

They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.

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