is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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