so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
You pole danced in your parka.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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