I wish I only lived at night.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I want her autograph on my taint
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
