She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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