i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize