You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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