I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
