I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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