he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
