id be glad to
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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