I am puke
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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