we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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