Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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