remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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