hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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