I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We need to get me chipped asap
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize