Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
