This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
