Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize