see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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