no, he came in my armpit
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
