Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
