How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
