I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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