Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I wish you could order shots online.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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