I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize