State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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