He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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