This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
