i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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