What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize