How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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