I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Ladies don't puke and tell
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
