Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
