Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he shaved USA in his pubs
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize